I think I am slowly coming out of the deep dark hole that's consumed me for about 6 weeks. A much needed weekend away forced me out of my rut and to plant a solid foot on the rung of a ladder. Several of us SJU gals and our spouses visited our friend Devon in north Jersey for an evening of tasty treats, drinks and catching up. I hung around through the weekend, toured Hoboken and then trained it into New York to visit Beth, get cracking on wedding photography, and attend a graduate info session at NYU.
I packed a lot into this one day - old school Chrissie style. But it was great. I took the subway all by myself! Usually people tell me which lines to take, but I sucked it up and read the map and boarded one, figuring I'd never learn unless I just did it.
We have the Final 56 - 56 wedding photographs to be featured in the album. Next up is deciding which to blow up and how to lay them out, but at least we have 56 photos narrowed from 700+. Accomplishment.
The NYU thing...this sounds great...like the Masters program I've dreamed of. It's through their Gallatin School of Individualized Study and is just that - individualized and interdisciplinary. Finally after attending info session after info session on a range of concentrations, I can and will coherently describe how I will mesh MBA classes with performance studies with production. I am convinced there is a comprehensiveness to all my desires and should a masters program make sense (and be financially doable), then this is THE school for me.
Last night as I stared bleakly at the TV, anticipating more rain and more unseasonably warm weather and going to icky work the next day, I remembered the day before and thought - why have it end in Village? I took a step in the right direction and through myself into something even in a dark hour. So I created 2 more pages for my scrapbook and managed to whip together some Betty Crocker sugar cookies. Even in my PMSed state right now, I'm getting crap done. I'm applying to a position at Orchestra 2001.
I needed a spark...something to light a fire again and at least move me to work actively, agressively toward something positive.